WEEK 12 RECAP

COMMISH NOTES: 
                      HAPPY DANCE

The Commish did this for 7 hours after ASU's victory

DEVILS WIN DEVILS WIN DEVILS WIN !!! Needless to say it was a glorious weekend of college football and all is right again in the universe as the good guys triumphed over the evil doers of the Old Pueblo !

On a sadder note Wilbur the Wildcat was arrested on a domestic violence charge after Wilberina (or whatever the Hell that thing is named) accused the Tucson mascot of going on a meth fueled rampage in their double-wide trailer after the Devils thumped the Kitties 52-37. Wilbur also allegedly downed 13 forties of Colt 45 and for some unknown reason promised to "kill that SOB Dick Tomey for what he did to my daughter!" YIKES !!

In more good news Ohio State lost as well.

YOU vs the POOL

WEEKLY WINNER

She's once, twice, three times a lady...this week's big winner is Lisa Lesley proving once again that when a sassy broad puts her mind to it she can accomplish anything. Lisa scored an impressive 16 win week but I think we can all agree it's time for you to get back into that kitchen and prepare a delicious Thanksgiving feast for the Lesley menfolk. Lisa says she plans to take her $100 in winnings and buy her man some new slippers and a pipe cause he deserves it.

WEEKLY LOSER

We had a cluster F of losers this week, in all there were 9 knuckleheads tied for last place with just 7 wins. I would have to write a novel length essay to go over their names and all their shortcomings so I will not even shame them here. If you would like to meet any of them in person they can all be found at their local Greyhound bus depot sleeping in the mens room. But there are 2 standouts that I feel I need to mention...

My old man Joe Watters is one of these 9 - he taught me everything I know about gambling and you all know how well that has gone.

The other loser of distinction is Steve Chabre and the only real reason to bring him up is that he is a UofA grad and any time I am able to point out what a loser somebody from Tucson is I will jump at the chance and did I mention Steve that ASU beat the Kitties this weekend...did I  ?

OVER ALL LEADER AND LUNKHEAD

Dave "Don't Judge Me Bitch" Jackson takes over the over all lead with a stellar record of 143 and 97 and don't worry bitch when you lose the lead and fall out of the money over the next 3 weeks we will all be judging you just fine !

Angela Driscoll continues to hold her vice like grip on last place with a pathetic 101 and 139 over all record...a full 42 games behind our leader. And again I can't really blame her having to deal with her "special" needs husband  Terence hanging around the house all day demanding his Cup 'O Noodles have more gummy bears or dealing with his night terrors brought on by images of Shirley Booth dancing in his head. Don't worry Angela the end is near.

THE PJA

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WEEK 11 RECAP

COMMISH NOTES: 

Not many notes this week from the Commish seeing that I watched zero football this weekend...Jr Commish had a hockey tourney up in Vail so I spent the weekend watching 12 year olds chase a puck - which is usually more fun than watching the hapless Devils this season. But my lack of viewing did equal a Devil victory so with that being said I may NOT watch ASU take on Tucson on Saturday. So anyways my new license plate sums up my feelings heading towards the Territorial Cup....

YOU vs the POOL

WEEKLY WINNER

In what can be described as the biggest miracle since Donald Trump's hair stayed in place at the 2014 "Chicago Hair Dryer and Leaf Blower Convention" (get it cause it would be windy there) this week's winner is the Corky of our little pool Terence "Pudding Boy" Brown - T goes by the screen name "Mrs Vincent Minelli" which shows what a fragile grip he has on his sanity, somehow scored 16 this week. Terence plans to take his $100 in winnings and finish his book "The Dummies I Loved" a romantic tale exploring man on puppet love.

WEEKLY LOSER

This week's chump is Mark Hodgson who came into the clubhouse with just 3 correct guesses - a season low. Hodg is no stranger to sucking in the pool his name has graced the last place column many a time. If you'f like to chat with Hodg you can find him at his Unabomber style shack feeding his 29 pet raccoons pretty much anytime other than when he goes to town to go dumpster diving.

OVER ALL LEADER AND LUNKHEAD

Mike Withey takes over 1st place after 11 weeks of guessing and sits atop of the standings of the greatest college football pool in this or any other alternate galaxy since the beginning of time. Mike goes by the screen name "LuckyAsHell" which seems pretty accurate and I'm sure his pool dominance will be short lived going down the stretch.

In an ironic twist of fate our over all loser in the pool is Angela Driscoll AKA Mrs Terence Brown who was this week's winner if you're able to remember 2 paragraphs ago. It's no wonder she's awful at the pool having to babysit Terence 24/7 - just keeping him from lighting himself on fire when he makes toast is a full-time job. If Angela hangs on to last place with 4 weeks to go not only will she receive College Football's most prestigious trophy...The Pewter Jack Ass (F you Heisman !)  she will also get the "Abe Vigoda Endurance and Perseverance in dealing with a Challenging Husband" Award. 

THE PJA

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Good Luck Suckas - the Commish








             

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WEEK 10 RECAP

COMMISH NOTES: 

Stat of the week Washington State was 1 for 1 on 5th down conversions. Not that the Devils are playing great but 2 weeks in a row the PAC12 refs just totally hosed the Devils. At this point I can't even make a lame joke about the Las Vegas Bowl cause the Devils will be at home playing Xbox come Bowl season.

After the debacle of the Wazzou loss the Commish wasn't down to watch anymore football so took a long ride in the sweet new Commish-mobile

(just in case you were wondering where all the pool funds were going

YOU vs the POOL

WEEKLY WINNER

Bill Lafave and Paul Lage each clocked in with a just above average week with 14 wins which just shows the level of competition in the pool.

Lafave goes by the screen name NY Hard which is either the name of his latest gay porn release or a reference to the severe problem he has with the 15 Cialis pills he pops every weekend while he watches reruns of Mayberry RFD...oooohhh that Aunt Bea !!!

Paul Lage enjoys lurking around mall restrooms dressed as Abraham Lincoln while Jazz scatting, Paul is a very sad man.

WEEKLY LOSER

Chris Coleman who goes by the screen name "AZ Cowboy", which again sounds like his Gay Porn Star stage name, managed to guess just 4 correct this week. When Chris is not running his multi-national world dominating flooring and tile empire he likes to re-enact famous Civil War battles with his troop of Spider-Monkeys in his front yard, needless to say his neighbors hate Chris.

OVER ALL LEADER AND LUNKHEAD

Dallas Davis continues his march towards pool immortality and sits on top of the college football pool world with a record of 122 and 78. With just 5 weeks to go can Dallas hang on to the lead and take home the top prize ? All the experts agree....NO !

Ernie Slaughter still is baffling those same experts with his piss poor performance and sports the miserable record of 82 and 118 after 10 weeks. This 2 time PAC12 Plus Pool champion must have been living the high life after blowing the millions in winnings from the pool and fried what was left of football picking brain.

THE PJA

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Good Luck Suckas - the Commish








           

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WEEK 9 RECAP

COMMISH NOTES: 

Yes I know there's no spread this week !

Our little experiment with no spread was interesting to say the least, as a group we did much better over-all although there were a few poolsters that really sucked it up. But the main reason we won't have a "no spread" week again is that the Commish fielded no less than 25 text and emails telling me "there's no spread Commish" and quite frankly that's way too much contact with any of you.

Well the only thing missing from the end of the Miami Duke game was the Benny Hill theme song playing in the background !

The Devils found new and interesting ways to lose a game last Thursday vs the Ducks - this time it took triple overtime and some of the most mind numbingly lame brain dip shit play calling this side of the 1982 ASU Sig Intramural flag football team after 24 pitchers at the Dash Inn. But who can blame ASU's QB, his mind is on other things, he has this waiting for him back at the dorm room.

And who knew poolster Jerry Siegel was so damn popular in Minnesota !

YOU vs the POOL

WEEKLY WINNERS

We had a 5 way tie of super geniuses for 1st place this week - and Duh !  it was easy with no spread - the rest of us, to make it fair, went ahead and used the spread - so enjoy your big "win". The following poolsters will each receive the enormous amount of $20 at season's end; Bob "Pudding Boy" Cook, Paul "Bumby" Roberts, Jen "Make me an Omelette" Mayberry, Pat "Bugeater" Moeschler, Warren "Poodle Diddler" Heffelfinger.

WEEKLY LOSERS

Don't ask me how, but even with no spread to contend with there were 3 poolsters that managed to come up with just 3 wins this week, i'm guessing the Tuesday morning selection process of "take a Sambuca shot pick a winner...take a Sambuca shot pick a winner" technique didn't really pan out for the following knuckleheads....Bill Fulton, Ernie Slaughter, and Dan Karas...shame on all of your houses !

OVER ALL LEADER AND LUNKHEAD

Dallas Davis, who if memory serves me, was a weatherman on channel 7 in LA in the 1970's sits in the drivers seat of this Ferrari Testarossa we call a pool with a record of 110 and 70. But we all know what happens when you drive a sweet car too fast, yes you drive it off a cliff in Monte Carlo with a real hot Euro-model sitting on your lap. So good luck Dallas.

Ernie Slaughter with a record of 71 and 109 currently sits alone in the basement of our little pool. We really aren't too surprised at Ernie's position, after all if he's in a crowded room and somebody yells "HEY SMART GUY" Ernie's not turning his head. What is surprising is like Tom Cruise in Rainman Ernie has actually won this pool twice, so is he sandbagging for last place and the PJA, only time will tell.

THE PJA
IN MEMORIAM

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Good Luck Suckas - the Commish

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