Week 15 recap and Pool Payouts

                                       COMMISH NOTES: 

Poolsters our 15 week "March of Misery" has finally and mercifully concluded. For the first time in the 10 year history of our glorious betting enterprise we have a non human winner to the pool – the autopick “UNDERDOG” actually won the damn pool, just think if you would have simply set your autopick to “UNDERDOG” you would be $2100 richer as we speak. Oh well you’re as dumb as the Commish. Also I’m not sure many of you are aware of the pool bylaw - Amendment 1A, that states and I quote …."Pathetic Pickers Clause" If at season's end any of the "Autopicks" i.e.: FAVORITE, UNDERDOG, HOME, OR AWAY win the pool outright against all playing members of the pool all remaining winnings will be given directly to a charity of the Commish's choosing (clause added September 2, 1967)”

And just so you know the Commish has chosen the “Kevin Watters Institute for the Study of Irish Whiskey” as the charity to send all pool winnings to. 

But upon advice of lawyers representing the PAC12 Plus Pool I have decided to avoid the invariable endless lawsuits and crying by the various pool “winners” and I will proceed to reward the following poolsters thusly…..

Pool Payouts

1^st Chase Vendl $2100+$125 weekly winnings = $2225

We had a tie for second place so the following poolsters will split the 2^nd and 3^rd place money.

Brandon Carlson $1350 and

Steve Smith $1350 +$100 weekly = $1450

4^th The pool's most handsome member Tom Sharp $720

LAST Place Greg “Doh” Dohmen $480 + the prestigious Pewter Jack Ass Trophy.

Weekly Winners

Cat Bellamak $100

John Burnham $100

Jason Clay $100

The Commish $50

Dallas Davis $100

Steve Delira $33.33

Angela Driscoll $50

Mark Hodgson $50

Rick Holm $50

Todd Jennison $25

Dave Kent $58.33

Bill Lafave $100

Jacquiline Lira $100

Gary McMahon $83.33

Tony Poleo $100

Don Reisinger $75

Tom Yetzer $100

So if you are one of the lucky few who made money from our 15 weeks of picking nonsense (FYI 22 of the 160 Poolsters did not waste their time and actually made money in the pool) I need from you the following information – Your address to send the money – also let me know if you plan to participate in the Bowl Pool and I will deduct the $25 entry fee.

Speaking of the Bowl Pool – I will resend the invite to everybody once again. But here are the basics - $25 entry fee – we pick all the Bowl games against the spread – and we will pick the winners of the playoff round once those winners are determined. I will include info on how to invite your family, friends, enemies, people on the bus, that guy who lives under the bridge, etc. What better way to ignore all of them then mindlessly watching every single one of the 177 Bowl Games this holiday season !

If you'd like to sign up for the Bowl Pool or invite people to join here's the link - 

http://www.officefootballpool.com/pools.cfm?poolid=54177&p=2&pwd=sundevils

YOU vs the POOL

WEEKLY WINNER

The Pride of Minnesota Tom Yetzer is this week's winner scoring an impressive record of 12-2 for the week - he plans on spending his $100 in weekly winnings on a case of Natty Lite and 10 pounds of Possum jerky and watching the Golden Gophers on the TV OK?

WEEKLY LOSER

Gregg Dohmen scored just 3 correct this weekend thus assuring his coming in dead last in the pool for the year. I'm not sure he actually meant to pick badly or that it just comes extremely easy for Gregg to suck - I vote for the latter !

THE PJA

See you next year Suckas - Maybe ?!?!?!

        MET BO BEBOS ! 

Good Luck Suckas - the Commish

OUR PATRON SAINT

WEEK 14 RECAP

COMMISH NOTES: 

Once again my beloved Sun Devils don't fail to disappoint, even with the gift of the Trees beating the Bluins ASU fell short down at the border truck stop. Say hello to the Poulon Leaf Blower Bowl boys !

              But Devils at least we got this going for us !

Anybody have the Help Wanted ads from Sunday's paper they could spare ?

Tick Tock

Hey Buffs do you miss this guy yet !

For all the Notre Dame fans in the pool the Commish is making this book available to you for just 99 cents !

With just a week remaining in the pool it's pretty much all over but the crying for about 95% of you Poolsters but for those select few still in the running for the cash it's time to whip out your super computers and clinch up your sphincter because we all know somebody's gonna blow it big time and end up with the big goose egg !

Hey for the rest of you the Bowl Pool is just around the corner so you can continue making bad decisions straight through to the new year !

YOU vs the POOL

WEEKLY WINNER

We had 3 geniuses this week each scoring 15 big wins. Gary McMahon, Dave Kent, and Steve Delira will split the $100 in weekly prize money. This will make for a merry Christmas in all of their homes because this cash infusion basically doubles their monthly income.

WEEKLY LOSERS

We had a 4 way log jam of losers this week - Scott Kilian, Andy Eppinger, David Schwartz, and Deborah Jackson each posted just 6 wins for the week. Quite frankly the Commish has run out of abusive things to say but I think we all know this is just but one example of the shame and heartbreak these 4 live with 365 days a year.

OVER ALL LEADER AND LUNKHEAD

Chase Vedl remains the strongman of the pool and sits on top of our little dungheap with a record 160-120 a full 4 games ahead of the 2nd place poolster. But we all know the intense pressure he is under and a full and total collapse is expected by the end of this final weekend of football.

Continuing their march of lameness are our 2 married nincompoops Kent and Demaris Walton who seem to have locked on to last place like RoseAnne Barr at an all-you-can-eat Sundae Bar ! Their season record sits at 113-167 a full 47 games behind our leader. I would say the coveted Pewter Jack Ass Trophy is still up for grabs but I think we all know where it will reside come next season !

THE PJA

        MET BO BEBOS ! 

Good Luck Suckas - the Commish

OUR PATRON SAINT

WEEK 13 RECAP

COMMISH NOTES: 
This is the big week when the mighty Arizona State University Sun Devils take on the Kitties from Gadsden Purchase Community College. This is the first time both schools have been in the top 20 since around 1895 when they played for a bucket of hard pone and the right to wear pants the rest of the year. And I'll leave it on one note - 
           GO STANFORD BEAT UCLA !!!!

The Commish is fully provisioned for the game on Friday !

To get every advantage - ASU is bringing this horrifying Sparky out of retirement to prowl the sidelines in Tucson.

Way to represent USC - you are now officially the Bruin's Bitch !

The horrific collapse of the Irish continues much to the delight of the college football world.

Sadly there was a fire in Brian Kelly's office after the Louisville game.

The boys are excited for the Iron Bowl !

                                 YOU vs the POOL

WEEKLY WINNER

Dallas Davis is this week's winner coming in with 16 big wins. Yet one more Husker that snuck into the pool. I'm not saying Dallas is friendless but he spends his free time playing Jazz flute and making dream catchers made of human hair which he then takes to his local "Curves" to try and sell to the less than interested housewives.

WEEKLY LOSER

Scott Kilian and Steve Delira both had a piss poor showing this week and landed only 6 wins for the day. Scott will claim that he has only picked using the "RANDOM" button this season but his computer browser history shows otherwise; last week alone he spent 17 hours viewing college football betting related web pages which only came in second to the 38 hours he spent looking at a website called 'Filipino Tranny Hot Oil Party"

Steve is a long time CAL Bears fan so losing comes naturally to him. Steve currently lives in a studio apartment with his 23 cats where he spends his days singing Hall and Oates songs to his little feline pals.

OVER ALL LEADER AND LUNKHEAD

Chase Vendi sits in first place over all with a record of 149-111 which has him tied with the Autopick choice of Underdog (very impressive). Chase is yet one more Bug Eater that infiltrated our pool and the Commish will make every effort next season to prevent any more of their kind into our exclusive ranks. But with just 2 weeks to go in the pool Las Vegas bookmakers say that there's just a 2% probability that Chase will finish in the money and not  blow it all away by making horrible "Pellini-esque" decisions.

Jurassic era poolsters Kent and Demaris Walton are clinging to the bottom of the standings like a lamprey feeding off the bloated body of a tapir bobbing in the murky waters of the Amazon river or in other words they absolutely suck at picking college games against the spread. With just 2 weeks to go I would be clearing space in your shopping cart that is currently stuffed with rags, newspapers, and old sofa cushions to make room for sports greatest prize - the illustrious Pewter Jack Ass Trophy !

THE PJA

        MET BO BEBOS ! 

Good Luck Suckas - the Commish

OUR PATRON SAINT