LET THE GUESSING BEGIN !
Welcome Poolsters to the 10th annual celebration of bad decision making called the Pac12 Plus Pool. What started off as a 3 member off shoot of "J-Date" in 1884 has now grown to a membership of 1.3 million with pool luminaries residing in prisons in all 50 states, the assistant manager of a Hardy's in El Segundo, the Duke of Cornwall, and the guy who played Sigmund the Sea monster
In keeping up with the yearly pool tradition of adding a member named after a sitcom star from a show set in a Nazi concentration camp or the victim of a bizarre sexual crime of passion - may I present - Fighting Illini fan Bob Crane.
John Vera is a longtime employee at NBC News, in fact he started as an intern for the Jack Benny radio show - his main duty was giving the said Mr Benny late night hot oil massages. 
Cat Bellamak is yet another spouse joining the pool. She shares a lean-to down by the Scottsdale aqueduct with her bi-curious husband Shawn, 37 cats, and a paper mache statue of Bea Arthur.
Casey Rhodes enjoys pudding wrestling with aggressive homeless people and that's why he's a fan of CAL.
Adam Teeley is an alum of the Sylvan Learning Center of the PAC 12 aka Washington State University. So, needless to say, the pool will be a struggle for Mr Teeley.
Amphone Baccam - Who by her name you can tell she's either a native of Scotland or a condiment used on Cambodian food. She's been a failure in our bowl pool and I expect her to do no better here.
Chris Linder is on pace to surpass the Duggar family by having the most kids in North America. He supports his vast brood by a shop that sells nothing but parachute pants and used Vanilla Ice CD's.
Tito Lopez is the nephew of pool dummkopf Bill Fulton so we are not dealing with a deep gene pool here - interestingly the only family that scored lower on the standardized IQ tests were the Kardashians.
Guy Graham, I believe, found the pool while he was surfing the web looking for "Plus size Pac12 girls at the Pool" and ended up here instead.
Roman Guemada Is going with the pool screen name of “The Fat Bastard” which I can only assume means he’s obese, lazy, and spends most waking hours prone on his couch watching football. So he’s a perfect fit for the pool. Welcome aboard !
Jason Clay is a graduate of the University of Alabama so let's all use small words when we speak with him. And if you wanna make him stutter just sneak up behind him and scream "WAR DAMN EAGLE"
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| ROLL TIDE ! |
Mike Plotnik is a cheese lover of the highest order. Bucky the Badger has filed a restraining order against Mike for the 12th straight year.
Jim Gherlone can be found most weekends at Chucky Cheese lurking in the ball pit until security shoos him away.
Eric Cooper is currently writing what he hopes will be a best seller - it's a trilogy about his summer job at Dairy Queen making Blizzards - best of luck with that.
Angela Preston is another Nogales Community Learning Center aka UofA grad to join our illustrious pool. And Angela before you ask - NO you can't live in our crawl space - NO we don't have any spare change and NO we won't give you a ride to rehab !
Michael Owens loves to give unwanted hugs, as a matter of fact he'd like the address of each and every poolster.
Cory Leibin is currently absorbing massive doses of radiation in a satellite news truck somewhere in America. But he's decided to take a job that much better for his health - he's going to sell bibles door to door in Fallujah
Thane Head as an Oregon Ducks fan is used to soul crushing disappointment at the end of every season, so therefore, his 149th place finish in the pool will come as no surprise.
Keith and Saul Larsen are another set of brothers to join the pool, and we all know how badly siblings have done. When they're not riding their bicycle built for 2 singing Wham songs the boys enjoy macramé in the nude.
John MacDonald is a fan of Ohio State's scrimmaging partner from up north and I'm not saying that John's a creepy guy but the character of "Buffalo Bill" from The Silence of the Lambs is based on his life.
Jacquiline Lira was last seen digging thru Justin Beiber's trash in hopes of finding fingernail clippings to add to her vast collection of celebrity refuse.
Randy Parkes is super serious about his collection of Beanie Babies and nearly beat a man to death for talking smack about his "Allegro the Ballerina Duck" baby.
Dave Shefte was team captain of the competitive Dungeons and Dragons team at Trinity University for 5 straight years - you can still find Dave, most nights, quietly getting drunk in his wizards outfit in his attic.
Andy Miller is the second Trinity University grad to join the pool (if you're wondering where Trinity is located - it can be found at any area WalMart Super Center between the deli meats and dairy section of the store)
Dirk Welzien is romantically involved with Oski the Cal Bear and they plan to adopt a Chinese baby later this year.
John Boxley is one more USC Trojan to join our ranks - he can be found most game nights dressed as Julius Caesar wandering around Westwood creeping out UCLA co-eds.
I'm guessing they just gave access to the internet to the inmates at the Pullman county jail because another Wazzu-ite by the name of Steve Morrow joined our little pool.
Rob "Mr Chicken" Bowe joins the pool. The only way I could get him to sign up was to tell him this was a competitive Ice Dancing pool. I won't tell him if you don't.
Also joining us once again after taking a year hiatus from the pool to re-align their chakras and explore their feminine side are Darrell Blasi and George Murphy.
ENTRY FEE
Once again the entry fee is a measly $50 so right this second grab your checkbook and write that check and send it to:
Kevin "the Commish" Watters
1 Columbine Lane Littleton CO, 80123
And because there's nothing the Commish hates more than paying bill collector for the few deadbeats we have each season I'm setting a hard deadline of week 2 to get your entry fee in - that date is Saturday September 13th. No entry fee by then and you are OUT - NO EXCEPTIONS !!!
PAYOUTS
Here's how the payouts will work out. We will divide the total entry fees as follows - once we take out the pool hosting fee the weekly winner will receive $100 (if there is a tie for 1st the winners will split the $100) The remaining money will be paid out at the end of the season:
1st place……35%
2nd place……25%
3rd place……20%
4th place……12%
Last place……8% - along with the prestigious Pewter Jack Ass Trophy. (You cannot miss a week of picks and still receive this honored prize)
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| The PJA |
Also side bets, trash talk (which can be found on the main pool page under the "Standings" Tab) and abuse of fellow poolsters is highly encouraged and any of you with thin skin need to grow a pair ASAP. And if you have any question about the pool or just need a shoulder to cry on please contact Jerry "The Tomato Clown" Siegel 24/7 at jerry-siegel@comcast.net
Finally I will do my best to set the games and weekly lines by sometime Monday afternoon each week but with my busy schedule of napping and reviewing local strip joints in the Thrifty Nickel that might not always be possible, so please be patient with your Commish.
As always - Good Luck Suckas
The Commish
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| MET BO BEBOS ! |
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| PUNT TUCSON PUNT |
